Human relationships? They’re beautifully messy because we’re beautifully, infuriatingly, creatively, and messily chaotic. Like trying to untangle a Gordian knot – it’s hard to be quite sure where one thread ends and another begins. We’re all constantly changing, which means our connections with others have to flex and flow right along with us. To me, it’s not about understanding every little detail of a relationship – It’s about what a relationship means.
Meaningful relationships don’t just help you get through the day – they makes life worth living. I’m convinced that the richness and the quality of our lives comes down to the richness and quality of our relationships. There’s very often that gap between what a relationship is and what it could be and it is in this tension the therapeutic work takes place.
So what’s this website all about? Think of it as an invitation to hit pause, to reflect and to explore what your relationships – with others and with yourself – really mean. Welcome.
Latest posts:
- Why we need rituals in our relationships - We often think of big gestures such as respect, care, attention, positive regard, friendship and when relevant, erotic connection as the most important ingredients of a good relationship and yes they are. Yet, I believe that it is everyday rituals that make these gestures meaningful. What are rituals? Rituals can be defined as expected, repetitive, routined and reliable behaviors or activities – sometimes culturally transmitted – that go beyond habit or tradition. They provide a sense of stability and predictability through structured actions and they also provide a sense of agency. Some rituals are personal, like the way we get […]
- Have We Become Obsessed with Fixing Our Relationships? - Here is a link to my article on the Welldoing website. Through therapy, you can learn to adopt a new and different approach to being together.
- Embracing the Dance: Handling Polarities in Committed Relationships - In his book the Road Less Travelled, M. Scott writes that couples cannot resolve fundamental issues such as dependency vs independency, dominance, and submission in a healthy way without the security of knowing that the process of struggling over these issues will not destroy the relationship. Committed relationships are not static destinations but dynamic engagements that require constant calibration. At the heart of this complexity lies the idea that healthy partnerships don’t resolve tensions between opposing needs—they learn to hold them simultaneously. Understanding and managing these polarities, rather than trying to eliminate them, is essential for relationship longevity and satisfaction. […]
- Pressure valves – why some tension is inevitable in relationships - A relationship is a creative pursuit – creative because it demands that we look beyond who we are right now and dare to imagine what we might become together. It asks us to constantly recalibrate as we – and our partners – evolve, shift and grow. But here’s the paradox: a relationship is also about stability, consistency, commitment and reliability. Trust doesn’t build itself on wish alone. So a relationship needs to be elastic enough to accommodate new discoveries about the person we’ve chosen to share our life with, yet comprehensive enough to answer the question: why you and not […]
- Kissing Menu - What do we mean when we speak about intimacy in a committed relationship? For some, intimacy is equated with sex, others speak of feeling emotionally close and connected. Be it physical or emotional, the one thing that most of us look for in intimate moments is to feel accepted, connected and that we matter to our partner. Enjoy.
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