In his essay “Of Vanity” the French philosopher, Montaigne, wrote “I know that the arms of friendship are long enough to reach from the one end of the world to the other”. Friendship, Montaigne believed, was the greatest pleasure available to us.
…Author: Gilead Yeffett
→Couples and individual psychotherapist, working in:
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In Antoine de Saint Exupery’s The Little Prince there is a dialogue between the little prince and a fox, which for me describes beautifully how a relationship is cultivated. Here is an excerpt, no extra words needed.
The little prince was lying on the grass crying when the fox appeared.
“Good morning,” said the fox.
“Good morning,” the little prince responded politely, although when he turned around he saw nothing.
“I am right here,” the voice said, “under the apple tree.”
Please–tame me!”
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Simone de Beauvoir said, ‘One’s life has value so long as one attributes value to the life of others, by means of love, friendship, indignation and compassion.’ She was right in that other people make our life meaningful and
In the second century AD, the Roman emperor, Marcus Aurelius, wrote to himself in his Meditations: it is your duty to stand straight- not held straight. Aurelius, a Stoic, believed that self-reliance, acceptance of what cannot be changed and clarity of thought to be of utmost importance and crucial to a fulfilling life. Much of his writing and the writing of other Stoics served the basis for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and other therapy approaches. Generally speaking, self-reliance to various degrees, has been the Holy Grail of many therapeutic approaches. Whilst self-reliance is believed to be a factor in developing resilience,
…In May I wrote that despite psychotherapy’s main aim to help people to become more aware of what they do and how they do it, there can be tendencies that if ignored may leave a person feeling isolated and impoverished and possibly feeling defeated.
Here is another one I want to flag up
Labels and diagnoses: Whilst the use of labels and diagnoses can be useful in giving meaning and direction, it is important to remember that they are man-made and as such they are non-natural. There is no objective truth when it comes to human behaviour, we are complex and creative. It
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Emotions seem to stir within us without much warning; some are easier to recognise than others – especially the ones that are more socially acceptable. We often try to extend those we perceive to be pleasant and avoid the disturbing ones. Wanting to avoid certain emotions has to do more with misunderstanding our relationship with emotions rather than the emotions themselves. Psychologists themselves can add to the confusion by dividing emotions into
One of psychotherapy’s aims is to help people to become more aware of how and why they do what they do and potentially offer additional ways of engaging with others and improving the quality of a person’s life.
Psychotherapy can make a significant difference when it incorporates into the work natural change processes such as education, friendships, family relationships, commitments and community life.
I find these conditions to be fundamental in shaping who we are and
…In this post, I will try to make Gestalt therapy ideas and concepts applicable to everyday life. I hope to open up the therapy room and lift a bit the weight from the individual seeking therapy and place it where I believe it belongs: the relationship. What I mean by that is that if we see issues less as individual issues, that is, within the person and more between people, we may be able to create more supportive, sustaining and enduring relationships.
A very brief intro: In the 1940s, Fritz and Laura Perls and Paul Goodman, the early founders Gestalt therapy, developed
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This was written on a wall in a London restaurant/ bike shop. As it was not signed, I give it an anonymous credit. I was inspired and touched when I read it.
“In the end we all hope that what we do matters and whilst we can’t change the world, we can all change someone’s
…In her book ‘Embracing Uncertainty’, Susan Jeffers tells a story of a Chinese farmer (or maybe he wasn’t Chinese) who discovered that his horse had wandered off into the forest. His neighbours said to him “how unlucky to have lost your horse” the farmer said “maybe it is, maybe it isn’t”.
Two days later his horse came back with another horse it befriended in the wild. His neighbours said to him “how lucky to have two horses” the farmer said “maybe it is, maybe it isn’t”.
The next day, while the farmer’s son tried to tame the new horse, he
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